Strangely enough I am not breaking down about the whole thing. He lacked emotional intelligence and had serious entitlement issues, to the point that he didn't feel like he should pay rent and insisted that we live with is parents. I turned down three job opportunities in a month and a half because he refused to move with me. We would talk about his girl problems, life in general, college, the job search and eventually my frustrations with my husband. Neither of us realized that our feelings weren't just sex until it happened. We know each other well enough to know that we could have an amazing life together.Haven't cried or gotten really angry, but at the same time this feels like a betrayal. I just deleted him from my contacts and left him with silence. Please know that I was trying to glean any insight he might have and gain a male perspective on the situation. I will NEVER ask him to choose and we will ALWAYS be friends.I thought a guy like him would never go for me, so his attention was flattering. We kissed a few more times, then I found myself paying late-night visits to his place. It wasn't until after we broke it off that my friend became suspicious.Other friends told me she had voiced some suspicions, but she never brought it up to me.We remained friends for many years after college, but now we're drifted apart.Separate states, separate lives, and, um, definitely separate boyfriends.
For the most part, I graduated with the same kids I'd played Red Rover and tag with on the playground.
I guess I am wondering what any one else thinks about the situation. The divorce s finalized about 4 months ago and I just got the final paperwork on her getting her half of my retirement about a week ago. Although we had a connection and I believe we both were physically attracted to each other, our relationship was ALWAYS platonic. I hope what I have shared gives you a little more to think about given your situation.
Know that I don't think he should've texted you.
We were still a crew, so spending time with each other wasn't weird. Any sense of guilt was overpowered by how overwhelmingly great it felt to have this guy like me. Did my heart speed up during long, intimate conversations? But that hunger to feel good can really gets you in trouble, can't it?
I didn't even think much of it when he started finding reasons to touch my arm, or when he started dropping regular compliments. And after my split, I liked the attention, liked that I could flirt when him and he reciprocated. He wasn't the typical guy I went for, with a bad-boy image and even a tongue ring. It was the worst thing I've ever done, and somehow... I knew she had a history of hooking up with other guys, and that's one of the ways I justified my actions to myself. I remember telling him, in a joking way, not to fall in love with me. This is just hooking up." So part of the chase became trying to get this cute guy to like me even more. You need to believe that someone desires you because your insecurity and your limited perspective are making you feel like no one will choose you again. So I spent my days with my best friend and my nights with her boyfriend, and lived as a terrible person for months.
But you're not a puppet master and they aren't puppets.